Arivukanru Exam student

Arivukanru is sitting his University final examination. He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window. He then removes his belt and throws it away as well. His shirt, pants, socks and watch follow suit.

The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on.

'Oye, I am only following the instructions,' Arivukanru replies, 'it says here, "Answer the following questions in brief."'

Arivukanru on society

· Two Arivukanru’s were fixing a bomb in a car.
Arivukanru 1: What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing?
Arivukanru 2: Don’t worry, I have one more.

· Arivukanru: What is the name of your car?
Lady: I forgot the name, but it starts with 'T'.
Arivukanru: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol.

· Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue you've broken!!
Arivukanru: Thank God! I thought it was a new one!

· At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Arivukanru: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head… Is he crying?

· Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Arivukanru: An old king's skeleton.
Tourist: And the smaller skeleton next to it?
Arivukanru: That was same king's skeleton when he was a child.

· Arivukanru to his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It's already raining!
Arivukanru: So what? Take an umbrella and go!

How to find arivukanru

How Can You Be Sure Someone Is Arivukanru?

• Sends a fax with a postage stamp on it.
• Tries to drown a fish in water.
• Trips over a cordless phone.
• Thinks socialism means partying.
• Studies for a blood test and fails.
• Gets stabbed in a shoot-out.
• Puts lipstick on his forehead because he wants to make up his mind.
• Takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
• At the bottom of the application form where it says: "Sign Here", he puts 'Scorpio'.
• Sells the car for gas money.
• Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead.
• Drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, "Airport left", he turns around and goes home.
• Gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.

Legal and not logical

Legal and not logical

After having failed his exam in Logistics and Organization, Arivukanru goes and confronts his lecturer about it.

Arivukanru, “Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?”

Professor, “Surely I must. Otherwise I would not be a professor!”

Arivuknaru, “Great, well then I would like to ask you a question. If you can give me the correct answer, I will accept my mark as is and go. If you however do not know the answer, I want you give me an ‘A’ for the exam.”

Professor, “Okay, it’s a deal. So what is the question?”

Arivukanru: “What is legal, but not logical, logical, but not legal, and neither logical, nor legal?”

Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give the student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an ‘A’, as agreed.

Afterwards, the professor calls on his best student ( Arivukanru kutty) and asks him the same question.

He immediately answers, “Sir, you are 63 years old and married to a 35 year old woman, which is legal, but not logical. Your wife has a 25 year old lover, which is logical, but not legal. The fact that you have given your wife’s lover an ‘A’, although he really should have failed, is neither legal, nor logical.”

Java Interview attended by our Arivukanru

Here is a interview given by our Arivukanru for the job in java office…

Interviewer: What is the difference between an Abstract class and Interface?
Arivukanru: Terms are different … nothing more

Interviewer: What is JFC ?
Arivukanru: Jilebi, Fanta & Coffee

Interviewer: Explain 2 tier and 3 -tier Architecture ?
Arivukanru: Two wheelers like scooters will have 2 tyres and autorickshaws will
have 3 tyres.

Interviewer: I want to store more than 10 objects in a remote server? Which
methodology will follow?
Arivukanru: Send it through courier.

Interviewer: Can I modify an object in CORBA?
Arivukanru: As you wish , I do not have any objections.

Interviewer: How to communicate 2 threads each other ?
Arivukanru: Sorry, Non living things can’t communicate.

Interviewer: Explain RMI Architecture?
Arivukanru: I am a computer professional not an architect student.

Interviewer: What is the use of Servlets ?
Arivukanru: In hotels, they can replace servers.

Interviewer: What is the difference between Process and Threads?
Arivukanru: Threads are small ropes. Make a rope from threads is an example for
process.

Interviewer: What is JAR file ?
Arivukanru: File that can be kept inside a jar.

Interviewer: What is JINI?
Arivukanru: A ghost which was Aladdin’s friend.

Interviewer: How will you call an Applet from a _Java Script?
Arivukanru: I will give invitation.

Interviewer: What is bean ? Where it can be used ?
Arivukanru: A kind of vegetable. In kitchens for cooking they can be used.

Interviewer: Write down how will you create a binary Tree ?
Arivukanru: When we sow a binary seed, a binary tree will grow.

Letter to lord Krishna...

Little Arivukanru came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner.

His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time
to tell his mother what he wanted.

Mom, I want a bike for my birthday.

Little Arivukanru was a bit of a troublemaker.

He had gotten into trouble at school and at home.

Arivukanru ' s mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a
bike for his birthday.

Little Arivukanru, of course, thought he did.

Arivukanru ' s mother wanted Arivukanru to reflect on his behavior over
the last year.

Go to your room, Arivukanru, and think about how you have behaved this
year.

Then write a letter to krishna and tell him why you deserve a
bike for your birthday.

Little Arivukanru stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to
write krishna a letter.

**************

Letter 1

Dear krishna,

I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike
for my birthday.

I want a red one.

Your friend,

Arivukanru


**************

Arivukanru knew that this wasn ' t true. He had not been a very good
boy this year,

So he tore up the letter and started over.


**************

Letter 2

Dear krishna,

This is your friend Arivukanru. I have been a good boy this year and I
would like A red bike for my birthday. Thank you.


Your friend,

Arivukanru

**************

Arivukanru knew that this wasn ' t true either. So, he tore up the
letter and started again.

**************

Letter 3

Dear krishna,

I have been an OK boy this year. I still would really like a
bike for my birthday.

Arivukanru

**************

Arivukanru knew he could not send this letter to krishna either. So,
Arivukanru wrote a fourth letter.

**************

Letter 4

krishna,

I know I haven ' t been a good boy this year. I am very sorry.

I will be a good boy if you just send me a bike for my birthday.

Please! Thank you,

Arivukanru

**************

Arivukanru knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to
get him a bike.

Now, Arivukanru was very upset. He went downstairs and told his mom
that he wanted to go to temple.


Arivukanru ' s mother thought her plan had worked, as Arivukanru looked very
sad.


Just be home in time for dinner, Arivukanru ' s mother told him.


Arivukanru walked down the street to the temple on the corner.


Little Arivukanru went into the temple and up to the altar.

He looked around to see if anyone was there.

Arivukanru bent down and picked up a statue of the radha.

He slipped the statue under his shirt and ran out of the temple,
down the street, into the house, and up to his room.

He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a
pen.


Arivukanru began to write his letter to krishna.


**************
Letter 5

krishna,

I ' VE KIDNAPPED YOUR GIRLFRIEND. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND
THE
BIKE!!!!!!

If Statue of Liberty was in India.

If Statue of Liberty was in India.
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which was designed by arivukanru.....

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Arivukandru arivu

Afraid that someone will take away your slippers when you leave them outside the place of worship?

Follow the same method as this genius Arivukanru!
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Arivukanru mokkai

Arivukanru was busy removing a wheel from Auto,
Man asks arivukaru, 'Why are you removing a wheel from your auto?'
Oye! Cant u read 'Parking for Two Wheelers only!'

Arivukanru and kutty

Arivukanru died and went to heaven.
When he got to the pearly gate Saint
Kutty told him that new rules here in
effect due to the advances in
education on earth. In order to gain
admittance a prospective heavenly
soul must answer two questions:

1. Name two days of the week that
begin with "T".

2. How many seconds are there in a
year?

Arivukanru thought for a few minutes
and answered...

1. The two days of the week that begin
with "T" are Today and Tomorrow.

2. There are 12 seconds in a year.
Saint Kutty said, "OK, Ill buy the Today
and Tomorrow answer, even though
its not the answer I expected.

But how did you get 12 seconds in a
year?" Arivukanru replied, "Well,
January 2nd, February 2nd, March
2nd, etc..." Saint Kutty opens the gate
without another word.

Best of Arivukanru

What do SMART Arivukanru and UFO's
have in common?

You always hear about them but never
see them.

Arivukanru in temple

Arivukanru goes to temple and sees
people puting coins in a box &
praying...
Arivukanru: Wow! How amazing. People
are talking to God through a coin
phone without a receiver!

Arivukanru in a interview

Arivukanru on an interview for the post of
detective was asked a question -

Interviewer - Who killed Gandhiji ?
Arivukanru- Thanks for giving me the job, I
will investigate

Arivukanru SMS

Arivukanru sent a SMS to his pregnant
wife. Two seconds later a report came
to his phone and he started dancing.

The report said, "DELIVERED".

Mr.Arivukanru

Arivukanru comes back 2 his car & finds
a note saying "Parking Fine"

He writes a note back and sticks it 2
pole "Thanks for the complement!"

Arivukanru in a job interview

Arivukanru applied for an
engineering position at ABC
CONSTRUCTION office in Chennai.
kutty from mumbai applied for the
same job and both applicants having
the same qualifications were asked to
take a test by the Department
manager Mr. kutty kutty. Upon
completion of the test, the results
showed that both men only missed
one of the questions. The manager
went to Arivukanru and said, "Thank you for
your interest, but we've decided to give
the job to kutty".

Arivukanru: And why would you be doing
that? We both got 9 questions correct.
This being Chennai I should get the
job!"

Manager: "We have made our
decision not on the correct answers,
but on the one question that you got
wrong. "

Arivukanru: "And just how would one
incorrect answer be better than the
other?"

Manager: "Simple, for the question
that both of you got wrong, Kutty put
down 'I don't know' as the answer. And
you wrote 'Neither do I'!"

Arivukanru kutty

A teacher asked her class for
sentences using the word "beans"..
"My father grows beans," said one
student.
"My father cooks beans," said another.

Then a Arivukanru kutty spoke up: "We
are all human beans."

Arivukanru to doctor

The doctor told Arivukanru that if he ran
eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he
would lose 34 kilos. At the end of 300
days, Arivukanru called the doctor to
update him-
Arivukanru: Dr., I have a problem!
Doctor: What? You didn't lose the
weight?
Arivukanru: Oh I lost the weight just fine...
Doctor: So what is the problem?
Arivukanru:
.

.

.

.

.


I'm 2400 kms from home!

aivukanru jokes

Every day a Arivukanru gets ready, wears
tie, coat , goes out, climbs
tree, sits on the
branch.

After a couple days of watching this, a
neighbor asks why he does this
Arivukanru: "I've been promoted to the
branch manager!"

Arivukanru jokes

Arivukanru appeared at the box office
of a cinema and bought two tickets. A
few minutes later he returned and
bought two more. When, after a short
interval, he appeared a third time and
offered to pay for two more, the ticket-
seller opened the little door in the
glass and spoke up.

'Aren't you the same gentleman who
just bought two tickets and two others
just a while ago?' she asked, puzzled.

'Yes', replied Arivukanru
plaintively, 'but there's some fool at the
gate who keeps tearing them up!'

arivukanru jokes

question: neenga engineering padikalana enna va aagi irupeenga?
arivukanru: MBBS padichu periya lawyer aaki padidaiya scientist aagi irupaen.....

arivukanru jokes

conductor: eppavum padila nikkiriyae nee enna watch manna?
arivukanru: eppavum sillarai kekkuriyae nee enna pitchai karana....

"arivukanru rocks..."

arivukanru jokes

Manager: what is opposite of "naan arivukanru illai"?
arivukanru: arivukanru da nee...
Manager: appo nee?
arivukanru: arivukanru kutty da....

arivukanru is a blog to post all mokka jokes.....
mokka will be posted regularly without any delay...


appadi podalana kochikatha.....